by Britney Spears




Leave Britney alone! Weird today that the person you could most level that at is her dad. Hashtag Free Britney.

Honestly, I don’t really understand any of that. In my mind, it’s preposterous that she could be nearing forty. Britney prototypes like Tiffany and Debbie Gibson are surely both still only seventeen also? I get this one confused with the snake one, even though I know this is the air hostess one. I think it’s because I like snakes. I *think* I like snakes. I probably like the idea of snakes more than actual snakes.

Back to this, it’s unclear as to the percentage of people who would book a ticket with an airline with ‘poison’ in the title. If anything, being poisoned would no doubt take my mind off the fact that I’m in a colossal metal tube full of petrol careering through the air at four hundred miles an hour. So I’m all for it.

It can’t be any worse than Ryanair*.

* Other terrible avitation companies are available.

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